How to positivize ghosting in three steps


Ah, ghosting! Generally, when we take such a violent wind, we rather want to release our frustration by insulting the author or the author of the maneuver. But as it seems that the positive attracts the positive – and that there is clearly a need for a boost on this side – as much try the soft method. Here are 3 ways to respond positively, therefore.

We should not be the only ones to know the term by heart, but we prefer to give the definition for those who would have been blessed enough by heaven to escape the relational scourge. Ghosting someone is to stop answering him overnight when we have been dating more or less intensely.

To be ghosted is therefore equivalent to feeling the freezing cold and the interminable wait for a response to a message that will, ultimately, never come. The worst part is being ghosted when everything is going well; the resulting feeling of incomprehension being all the more complicated to manage.

Beyond the act in itself that one undergoes the full force, the sequence of events remains just as unhappy. Questioned, hope that skyrockets and then shatters as we understand what is happening, disgust for relationships in their entirety – even if it will last only ten days -, depressed before his plate of shells (without grated Gruyère).

Just to paint a slightly less gloomy picture, we looked for ways to take ghosting positively. Because there must be something not too catastrophic and exhausting to draw from this situation, let’s say, moldy to the core?

Yes, and here are three.

1- Tell yourself that fate makes us a flower

Okay, being faced with the two contemptuous blue ticks of Whatsapp (the ultimate sign that the person opposite has read and clearly has no intention of answering) doesn’t really make you want to thank life.

But think a little five minutes.

If your crush of the moment is not even able to explain clearly to you that he or she does not wish to see you any more whereas technology allows to do it while remaining well hidden behind his screen, it is that we are on a good dose of pure and hard cowardice. And do you really need this in your daily life? Not sure.

2- Take the opportunity to respond to the people we have left in the background

None of us are really innocent when you think about it. We very often put a message aside by saying that we will reply later (very often out of weariness or disinterest of the sender), then forget without a state of mind.

Now that we are well aware of the unpleasant twinge of heart that ghosting represents, we might as well improve our own behavior.

Even if we are friends with whom we are cold rather than a potential future conquest, being honest about the reason for our silence is essential. We will feel better for having clarified things, and we will be able to congratulate ourselves on having nothing to do with the junk that gave us eczema by dint of waiting.

3- Take stock of how we manage disappointments

It is often difficult to accept rejection. The reason? We take it directly for ourselves. Rather than wondering if the object of our desires was not a little too idealized compared to what he or she really had to offer us, we automatically say that we should not be good enough to deserve His attention. Doubt as to our value as a person insidiously settles in, to slowly eat away at the little self-confidence that we have left.

Instead of this extremely repetitive self-destructive scheme, it is, therefore, better to put a little lead in your head: certainly, the wind is harsh, but it is also one less “relationship” to be knocked before meeting the one or the one with whom we will build a good part of our life.

You will see, we immediately feel better.