When we want to meet the ideal partner, the one with whom we will spend our whole life, we do not realize enough about certain aspects. In order to avoid unnecessary suffering, you have to ask the right questions, make the right paths that will allow you to get to the point, and not waste your time !!
By working this way, you will avoid going out with men who do not suit you. You will avoid going into sterile stories that give nothing and that make you suffer.
It is true that at the start, many of us will flash on the physique of a man. They will also be sensitive to other trivial aspects that will not be very convincing.
In fact, this is what comes up most of the time in my coaching. But unfortunately, this is not what will make you happy, and who will develop a long-term relationship …
There are far more important and essential points to which one must pay attention before engaging with a man.
So how do you go about making a mistake, finding the right partner, and finally being happy?
Here are 3 essential keys that will allow you to find the right person and do away with these stories that do not work.
1- He is the man of my life:
Who never got carried away with a man at the first meeting, at the first moments spent together, throws the stone at me ^^
As long as he knows how to take us and charm us, we love it.
We let our mind wander, embellishing, and idealizing the situation.
If at the start of a relationship you can quickly go into hyperbolas, such as “He is an extraordinary man, he is a perfect man, he is the person I dreamed of, etc.”, we can also very quickly disillusioned.
At the beginning of a relationship, it is obvious that one will always present oneself in its best light.
The person you are going to meet will have put himself on his “31”, will make efforts to charm and please you. However, to succeed in finding a person who suits you, you must allow yourself time, let the attachment that you will feel for each other grow. But above all, give you the opportunity to discover him and know who he really is?
This allows you to avoid many surprises and to know if it suits you or not.
This is why it is wise to test these reactions over the long term, to see if he is still as considerate over the weeks, available? Does he always get involved in the relationship as much? How does he react to all kinds of difficulties or worries that appear in his life? It’s not about being restrained, or preventing yourself from having a good time, just trying to be pragmatic and watch out of the corner of your eye.
2 – See if you are complementary:
First of all, you have to see if you are both complementary. Are your actions going in the same direction?
I take the example of Sylvie, who loved to travel. On the other hand, her spouse preferred to invest and buy a house. Their relationship couldn’t last long. Or the story of Amélie who did not want children when her husband wanted four !!
Even if at the outset, the two partners have a very strong attraction for each other, their differences will overcome the relationship. There will be one of the two who will feel frustrated and trapped. All this will eventually break up the couple at a time when another.
You understand that to avoid all this, you must not linger with a person who does not have the same tastes as you, the same aspirations !!
Doing so doesn’t come against romanticism, which is great in a relationship. But rather it allows us to preserve ourselves and choose a person who will be worth it.
3 – Being able to keep your freedom and your individuality:
At the beginning of the meeting, one is always tempted to live a passionate union, where one and the other are always together. I take the example of Marie who was very flattered that her companion asked her to stop going to the gym on Sunday morning. He wanted her to stay with him and wanted to be able to hang out in bed together. At first, this change did not bother her. Then over time, her darling stayed every Sunday morning to make endless sleep. She had to wait for him to wake up so they could finally do things together. She had some resentment over it all. She who had stopped her activities to please him, had deprived herself of her favorite sport to stay with him, she felt cheated. Furthermore,
Let us take another example, that of the person who asks the other to change for him.
For example, he may want you to change your clothing style, that you no longer hang out with the same friends you used to meet before meeting him, etc.
To be able to live a fulfilling life, both for ourselves and for relationships, we must maintain our individuality and our particularity. If we change for the other, we extinguish our charisma and we half-mast. The wealth that we will bring in the couple, these are all the things that will allow us to grow and enrich ourselves outside the couple. These are the same things that we will relate to within the couple.
If we let our creativity, femininity emerge, we will have a real aura, a crazy charm, which will be attractive and will animate the relationship.
On the contrary, if one forgets oneself through the other, one dies and one dies. We become sad and frustrated and our partner will live by the side of a woman different from what he had known and he will detach himself from it. Choosing the right person with whom we will engage allows us to gain in quality…
Also, as with other spheres of our life, it is best to spend some time choosing the most appropriate direction for our future…
This awareness upstream is worth it, even if it sometimes costs us. In the future, the choices we will have made will be truly in line with our deep aspirations, our needs as women, and our life goals !!