It is not difficult to feel grateful and to be grateful when all is well.
And besides, when all is well, we do not hesitate to do it! And there we know how to feel gratitude, to be grateful for what has just happened in our life!
But what about when everything goes wrong? What about when a relationship ends? When were you betrayed? Or are you sinking because you only have hard times?
Gratitude can be a difficult feeling to feel when you are really sad or unhappy, but as you will read today, you can still be thankful even when you do not feel particularly empowered to feel gratitude.
In fact, a practice of constant gratitude, in good and bad times, is one of the most powerful tools to improve your health and happiness, it is a practice that you can start now.
1. So how do you feel gratitude when everything is going wrong?
Basically, just look for the way you could be thankful (to yourself already!) That will trigger essential brain activity: the production of dopamine and serotonin, acting on sleep and regulating mood and metabolism.
The next time something bad happens and you can’t think of anything that makes you thankful, guess what? Just looking for gratitude is beneficial!
It is essential to distinguish between feeling grateful and being grateful.
We cannot totally control our emotions. You can’t easily decide to feel grateful, less depressed, or happy. But it can be learned.
Your feelings, your feelings, your emotions come from the way you look at your life, in the world. Feelings arise from the way we react to events. The thoughts, the vision we have of things, what they should be and the connection between these two perceptions.
But to be grateful, to be grateful is a choice, an attitude that endures and that puts you relatively safe when you are going through difficult times.
When a disaster happens like a divorce, a sentimental breakdown, gratitude offers a perspective that allows us to see life as a whole and not to be overwhelmed by temporary circumstances.
Yes, this prospect is difficult to obtain – but my practice and my experience indicate that it is worth dwelling on it and making the effort to seek gratitude.
In fact, an attitude of gratitude can not only help you to increase your positive emotions but also to maintain them. As someone I know well would say, a nice pair of shoes can make us happy at a time “T”, but gratitude leads to long-term happiness.
The most basic practice to quickly transform your life – at any time of the year – is gratitude. A deep and sincere sense of appreciation for what you have in life.
2. Apply gratitude in difficult times
As you can see, it is in difficult times that we need gratitude the most!
What if saying thank you was the best way to be happy?
Learn to say thank you
I can already see your reaction! “He just threw me like a vulgar Kleenex ©, I’m collapsed, unhappy, I’m crying, I’m not sleeping anymore, I’m not eating anymore and to whom I’m going to say thank you, eh to whom ??” To me? to him? ”
I then adopt what the Americans call “Out of the box”, that is to say, to see things from another angle, completely different, not usual, to go completely outside the box, to be “out of the box”.
Concretely, how can I feel gratitude at the worst time of my life? Ask yourself this question, really, look deep inside of yourself how could you be grateful to yourself and/or to him in this specific case?
Of course, it is a difficult exercise, but it is less so than letting the collapse take place. And as I said above, just the fact of seeking this gratitude causes in your brain, the production of hormones which will decrease your current stress. This exercise is incredibly powerful and effective.
Of course, I will not give you answers, because it is you who have them, within you, according to your history.
Find a way in yourself to say thank you, or even say thank you. Trust me, it works. You can not get there right away, do not worry, everything is normal, you must do this exercise daily. And by dint of searching, we end up finding. And at least experience gratitude for yourself.
You can also, more simply, be grateful to the people who support you, your team of supporters (for those who follow my program), your parents, your friends, colleagues at work. Gratitude is practiced everywhere and with everyone!
The jar of gratitude
It is a very well known exercise because it works very well. It is just as powerful as the first one because when you are in chaos in your life, it brings you back to moments of the day that have been positive for you. And you know what? There are always some.
Take a jar of jam (empty of course), in a short a transparent jar. Each evening, you will write on little Post-it © papers, moments that made you smile or good, or acts or attitudes that made you happy during the day.
Place these folded little papers in your gratitude jar. Do this exercise daily especially if you are going through a difficult time in your life. Perhaps, “I got a call from Marie, it made me super happy”, “Bruno did me a favor at work, I found it very nice of him”, “Elise m ‘ smiled and told me not to worry, it will get better soon, it touched me. ” The examples are endless and can be very basic, very simple.
And when all goes bad, let your negative emotions overwhelm you, open this jar of gratitude and reread all these little papers. You will realize then that there are positive things in your life and that sometimes, even if you are no longer able to see them, they are there, they exist. This is what will allow you to move forward, to boost yourself to move forward.
Reading these gratitudes, these moments of recognition will act on your brain, on your emotions.