Dislike to fall in love again: 3 key steps not to zap


Even the best things come to an end, including love stories … When some experience ruptures like the simple end of a chapter, others remain frozen in an often idealized vision of the past. Here are some tips to learn to “dislike”, an essential step before you can leave, the flower with a gun and a light heart, to conquer love.

“Love stories end badly in general,” sang the Rita Mitsouko… Thank you Captain Obvious! Once this observation is made, a question remains unanswered: how to teach the brain to make the most of this sentimental experience to move on, bounce and not stay, the big heart and gout in the nose, engulfed under a bunch of handkerchiefs.

Introspection

The first solution: accept your pain. Like any being endowed with sensitivity, it is quite normal to be affected by separation. The key is not to constantly try to conceal your temporary discomfort but to accept it. This is an essential step to mourn a relationship. Finding yourself alone in front of yourself, without setting out again in immediate search of a new adventure can be saving. Time and acceptance offer the opportunity to take a clear look at the past relationship. And to realize that it has certainly been idealized. In addition, introspection is about getting to know each other better, gaining self-confidence and therefore setting milestones for the future. This process should already take some weight off your shoulders.

Go forward

Introspection is good, but not forever! Go forward. If the temptation to throw away all the objects related to your old relationship is tormenting you, you can keep those that arouse in you a happy thought, without being melancholic. In addition, in the age of social networks, “likes”, “retweets” and “selfies” on Instagram are all around, the temptation to stalk – spy on your ex’s profile until you know the smallest details – is sometimes great. The best is to close this page to move forward, a little “unfriend” can not hurt.

Start again!

Do not cut the bridges, at least for a while, it is the risk of not focusing on yourself. And it is valid for SMS ! Go easy on mutual friends and come back when you feel emotionally ready, that is to say strong, therefore capable of projecting yourself towards another person.

At the end of this process, more or less long, of acceptance, you will be ready to let yourself be seduced again and make this somewhat bleak pass a force.