Of course, we all know how important forgiveness is, but its importance does not mean that we have to do it right away. When something happens to us or someone hurts us, it’s normal to keep the anger we feel, at least for a while.
If we forgive too quickly, we cut ourselves short and are not allowed to deal with the problems we are going through on a scale as we need them to be. Below I will go over some of the reasons why forgiving others may not be the best idea from the start, sometimes letting them sit and marvel while working alone is the best option. Of course, it may seem fun not to dwell on something that is depressing you but allow you to tackle everything that surrounds it.
8 reasons why it is not necessary to be quick to forgive others:
1. Someone must be held responsible, forgiving will not always allow it.
Sometimes when we forgive someone, we limit the possibility of holding that person accountable for their actions. When we do this, we have to ask ourselves if forgiving them is really worth it. Should they be held accountable for their actions and their words, or should they deserve to get away with it easily?
2. Forcing yourself to forgive the feelings you feel in yourself.
When we have to confine our own emotions to be able to forgive someone, we should not forgive them. It’s an empty situation that makes you feel like you’ve done something for someone else when forgiving someone who hurt you is meant to be for you, not the person who hurt you. wrong. If you have nothing to gain in the end, don’t waste your time.
3. Forgiving sends the message that you approve or that you agree with what happened.
If the person you’re dealing with takes your forgiveness as an invitation to come back to your life, don’t waste your time. You do not agree with what happened and you pretend that it will not make you feel better. You have to work on your own things before you consider this stuff.
4. Forgiving someone gives them the chance to do the same thing again.
Forgiving someone is not always the best idea for many reasons. Many times when we forgive someone, they turn around and do the same thing again. They feel like allowing them to stay in your life is an invitation to keep hurting yourself and it shouldn’t be like that.
5. Forgiving in certain ways eliminates the pain felt by someone.
While forgiving someone may feel good at the right time, if you’re still in pain, it’s not the best idea. Depending on the person, they may take this as the pain is no longer present and you do not want to allow it. Forgiving when you are ready and not when everyone wants you to be ready is something you have to work on.
6. Sometimes forgiveness takes more energy than it is worth.
Forgiving others is not always worth it. If they are going to continue doing the same thing or are not going to understand that they have done something wrong, for starters, why waste energy? Sometimes it is enough to choose to leave without saying anything.
7. If you’re not ready to forgive someone, you shouldn’t force yourself to forgive them, period.
Forgiveness is something you should do in your spare time. If you are not ready, do not do it. You are the person who decides when a person is forgiven, no one else can make that kind of decision for you.
8. They did not show remorse or really ask to be forgiven.
If someone does not regret what they have done, they do not deserve an apology. They must recognize that they have hurt you before you can forgive them. Brushing things under the carpet should never happen.