Tinder, Adopt a Guy, Meetic … Dating sites and applications have been phenomenally successful. However, it is not always easy to find true love there. If you’re looking for a serious relationship, these tips may help you find the gem.
How did you meet each other? This banal question that is often asked of a couple can quickly be embarrassing for you if you have known your partner through a dating site. May … or could. Because with the boom of dating sites and applications, such as Adopte Un Mec or Tinder, meeting your other half via the internet now seems much less extraordinary, and therefore more annoying than that.
Only here, in life as on the canvas, it is not always easy to maintain its relationship with the beautiful fixed after the euphoria of the first meetings. And it’s sometimes more difficult when you go through dedicated online platforms. On the Elite Daily site, blogger Alison Segel shares her experience of “love hunter” and gives 5 (good) tips for establishing a real relationship when you go through dating sites.
1- Chat as if you were playing a ping pong match
The first thing to do when you start using this kind of site is to not get discouraged too quickly. His photo is hot but the guy in question does not have many conversations? The first contacts are charming but it turns into harassment and the guy floods you with messages? Go on to the next one. Try until you find the right person. And once it is done, offer him to continue to exchange via another channel (by SMS or on What’s App for example). And above all, be diligent in your answers. “Chatting on online dating sites is a lot like playing ping pong. Respond to messages that interest you regularly without making the person sending them to wait too long. Otherwise, they may feel frustrated or rejected and to zap you ”
2- Stay enthusiastic about knowing him
Chat on a dating site can sometimes be like a real marathon. Indeed, you can quickly feel overwhelmed in front of the multitude of pretenders who consult your profile and start the conversation. It can even happen to you to chat with guys who have the same first name. In this case, be careful! It would be a shame to ruin your relationship with Jérémie n ° 1 (which you appreciate) simply because you made a mistake by confusing it with Jérémie n ° 2 (which interested you a little less). To avoid this kind of blunder, Alison Segel offers a simple solution: stay enthusiastic about the idea of talking with all your contacts. “I know it can be exhausting. But if you’re looking for something serious, try to know each of your” dates “in a unique way. actually interesting to them. Ask them questions about their lives or ask them to keep you posted on the progress of their projects if they have told you about them. “
3- Do not hide forever behind your computer
It may seem absurd to mention it, as it seems obvious, but one of the golden rules to see your relationship evolve is to meet the person with whom you interact … for real. Indeed, you may come across what you think is the ideal man. But if he doesn’t ask to meet you after a while, stay on your guard. Alison Segel has been in contact with a man for 4 years … without ever meeting him once! “At first I thought he was married. So I investigated to find out that he was not. Then I said to myself that he must be too busy. eventually realized that he was just not interested. So I stopped responding to his messages, “she says.
Moral of the story: If you really like the person, don’t wait too long to meet them in reality. You might miss the mark and regret it afterward. And if it’s stuck on the other side, go to another person. This meeting is certainly not worth it if the other does not give you time when you have offered him several slots and you have restarted him many times.
4- Play the romanticism card
You have managed to take the plunge and you will finally meet your favorite correspondent. Now another question arises. How to stay natural? For Alison Segel, nothing beats a touch of romanticism, especially when you only know the person through their avatar photo. “To make it look like a real date, use small romantic gestures. Bring a gift like flowers or wine, and treat yourself if it makes you feel good,” says the blogger.
5- Stop texting and pick up your phone
With the advent of SMS and conversation apps like WhatsApp or Viber, phone conversations are becoming a rare commodity. However, it can be very practical to call yourself either after the first “real” meeting or even before, just to get to know each other better. “Calling before allows you to put a voice on a name and get to know the person better. And often, it takes us a minute to say what would have required 30 exchanges by SMS,” comments the blogger. “Besides that, it avoids misinterpretations or misunderstandings,” she adds.
And on this, we must recognize that it marks a point. Which of us has never spent an entire evening dissecting an “ambiguous” message to decrypt its hidden content, when in fact the guy was just a wrong word because of the automatic correction? In addition, a study published last year revealed that too recurrent SMS exchanges can harm the health of your couple.