In the best of all worlds, we shouldn’t be asking ourselves this question. Now, we sometimes wonder about the depth of our feelings towards the other, and this is completely normal. Do I still really love him or is it the feeling of security that makes me think that everything is fine?
Here are ten questions to ask yourself to help you see more clearly.
Do you like the moments spent with him?
Do certain moments have a little je ne sais quoi that make you feel good and happy? Laughter, a moment of complicity or even a tear? It may be as trivial as reading a magazine while listening to hockey, but you’re stuck together and exchanging stuff once in a while, and you’re feeling great. It is important to appreciate the moments spent together, because if you start to stretch your days at work to decrease the moments when you are with him, a bell rings.
Do you miss him?
It’s so good to miss your loved one! And when we are in love, we miss the other. We think of him, we can’t wait to know how his day was, etc. I’m not saying we have to be bored the minute we have to separate! Love is not synonymous with addiction. It is simply the tangible happiness of being well together and anticipating these moments positively.
Do you have plans for the future with him?
Future plans are essential to the couple’s health. They allow lovers to look straight ahead and in the same direction. Whether buying a house, starting a family or simply a weekend of skiing, these joint projects solidify the couple in a constructive way and allow lovers to create beautiful moments of complicity. If you no longer want this type of project for two, your future may no longer be by your side.
Is s**x present?
Not only must s**x be present, but it must be fun! S**xuality must have a place of choice within the couple because the s**xual complicity enriches the life to two. Although a drop in libido is completely normal from time to time for both partners, desire can be an excellent barometer of the feelings you feel for your man. There has been no desire for a long time and you have done everything to remedy it? Love may not be as strong as you think …
Do you appreciate it for what it really is?
Do you really like his personality? His squeaky humor, his way of cooking, his hobbies are they still a source of love or if these traits now give you goosebumps? You know, far too many women try to change their man after a few years of living together. However, they are exactly what they were at the very beginning and there is a good chance that this is how they remain. Too much to change on him? As well completely change the model …
Do you want to please her?
When we love, we give without counting. It’s cliché, but it’s true that the moon seems the only limit. Do you still want to please her? To concoct his favorite dish, to massage his shoulders, to kiss him and give him chills, and this, without return? As the other would say, there is love in the air! If, on the contrary, everything seems like a chore and you no longer have the strength to listen to his desires, it is better to leave and give him the chance to be with someone who will.
Are you proud of him?
Love comes with a sense of pride. We are in love and we put each other on a pedestal. It’s normal! We have all known these kinds of women who continually touted her husband by simply mentioning that he made the best apple pies in the world or that he was the Greek God of BBQ. Your first reaction (after telling yourself that this woman is exaggerating): no doubt, she loves her madly! So, here it is, if no more mutual pride emerges from your relationship, it’s time to ask yourself about your romantic feelings.
Do you like to share with him?
A funny moment at the office and immediately you tell yourself that you can’t wait to tell your man! You know it’s going to end up looking questioningly with a “Is that all?” “And a” Yes, but you had to be there! », But this exchange is important because it is part of your married life. Men like to tease us about the fact that our stories are often harmless, but rest assured, they really appreciate your exchange intentions! The same goes for the more vigorous discussions. Communication is essential and our desire to share results from a feeling of love and trust.
Do you find him attractive?
Even after several years of living together, do you still find him s**xy in his Adidas joggers? No doubt, love is still present. His smile makes you melt, his laughing eyes, his buttocks under the towel rolled up at his waist, in short, you still find him very attractive and that’s a good sign! But if you feel more and more indifferent to his charm and even his aesthetic efforts leave you cold, ask yourself. Love also resides in the power of seduction.
Do you want to invest in your relationship?
Wanting to invest in a romantic relationship means accepting that everything is not perfect and making the necessary efforts to remedy bad times. Living together is not a long, quiet river and the more we let things go, the more the relationship will drift.
Do you still want to stay the course and fight body and soul for the success of your couple? If so, hold on to the love you have left and make the necessary efforts to be happy with your man. If you no longer have the strength and energy to do so, take a step back to better assess your needs in your love life.
Do not hesitate to meet a therapist if the situation becomes too difficult to manage alone!